I think I overdid it on Tuesday (do you think?). Yesterday, I started to feel a tightness in my chest, and today I really felt like a cold coming on. I stayed in the RV the morning and studied Romans 8, in preparation for this weekend, but then took off to the gym for my workout with my personal trainer. I told her how I was feeling, so she didn't push me too hard or too long. Came home and had a meeting with a couple of women – we met in the RV. I feel like I'm still at a campground, right in my yard. I don't want to go in my house, but I am certainly close to it! We're sleeping in it again tonight.

I succumbed to the tiredness and laid down for an hour, but couldn't sleep. But I did rest. Feelings of fear have come over me all week, but I pray and try to stand on the promises of God. I prayed on the armor of God in the shower today. I used to do this years ago, and thought of it recently. The belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shield of faith, the shoes of the gospel of peace, the sword of the Spirit, and the helmet of salvation. Just to picture these items being in my spirit helps me realize that I am God's child and He is protecting me. Oh, how soon we forget who and whose we are!

After supper, we went up to Doug's parents to see his sister, Joy, and nephew, Nicholas, who are home from California for a bit. We haven't seem them for many, many years. So good to reconnect. Joy told me she reads my blog every Sunday morning. That blessed my heart. She's so awesome. Our regret is that we've not seen her much over the years, due to the distance. She came home for their father's 80^th birthday. Happy Birthday, John A. MacDonald! September 18^th. And also Happy Birthday to Brenda's boy, Aaron, who turns 15 tomorrow as well.

I had a dear friend of mine tell me recently to be more honest with my feelings on the blog. Like everyday stuff I go through, not just the hard stuff like low white blood cell count scares and mastectomies, and the like. I don't want to seem like I'm complaining or having a pity party. But, my life is hard lately. On my own, it's extremely difficult, and I really find I have to reach out to others for help, and to my God who has never failed me in the past, and who will never fail me in the future. Sometimes getting up in the morning is a difficult thing and doing everyday tasks a chore. I can't seem to get my head together some days. That's why I asked good old Mom to help me clean up my house next week. I need to get ready for teaching the following week, and just don't know where to start. Plus, I need to start living in my house again. I really haven't lived in it since the first of June!

Need to go and get ready for bed, and get RV ready to take off in the morning. Doug is driving my temporary house to his work, so we can take it to Camp Tulakadik for this weekend's retreat. "More Than a Survivor." Should be an interesting weekend for us all.

I go to Dr. Christie's office tomorrow morning for a repeat PAP smear. I had an abnormal test six months ago, so a repeat is needed. Again, pray that all is well. Honestly, I wish I could just have someone tell me in a loud, audible voice (God, it would be nice for you to speak to me this way….) "You are healed, Deb: all is well!" But since God doesn't speak audibly much, I must have faith and just BELIEVE. Remember the BELIEVE signs that Dawn Marie and Greg & Viv gave me way back in the wintertime? I still have them on display, and BELIEVE signs are posted everywhere, along with HOPE.

Talk to you next week….

!Deb