Superstore Blues

Superstore -- where I like to shop. Things happen there. I meet many people there. But yesterday afternoon, this was the funniest thing that was said to me there. I said hello to Doug's older uncle in the store. His wife Marion passed away a few years ago. She had breast cancer years earlier.

I said, "Hi, how are you doing?" "Fine," he replied. "How did you make out at the hospital?" (Doug told him I had an appointment with the oncologist). Then he said this (Natalie was standing next to me): "Marion has a couple of breasts up at the house if you'd like to have them." (Her old prostheses) Taken aback a bit, I replied, "Oh, thanks, but I have one at home. No one has ever offered me something like that before." I stood there a second, not knowing how to continue. Then I said, "You should just throw those out." He replied, "Oh, no, I never throw anything away." Me: "Right, someone else might need them, but I'm OK. Thanks anyway." We walked away and when out of earshot broke down. Spare breasts anyone? I know where you can find some. It was very kind of him to offer them, though. Only at the Superstore, do I find myself in the strangest predicaments!

Then Natalie told me that she had seen a man with a beautiful shiny bald head and a black goatee in the baby food isle. He was bending down to find something. She was staring at his head and became enamored by it. She almost reached out and touched it, then realized, "What am I doing?" and took off.

Only at the Superstore you say.