Sunday 1 February 2009

Saturday & Sunday

On Saturday, we traveled to Coldstream, wherever that is. A picturesque village somewhere. I'm trying to put it on the map. Went to the old homestead, where Aunt H., Uncle F., and my pirate cousins live. Uncle F. was trying out the invention that Doug built for him for his home heating system. They were pleasantly pleased – it worked! Most everything Doug touches works, I find. He is an inventor extraordinaire. I visited with Aunt H., took a walk around the farm and watched the men at work. Visited with cousin W. and cousin B. before they took off for a trip to Arizona. Funny, they didn't ask me to come. Oh well, maybe next time.

The Pirate was driving Uncle F.'s John Deere 4110 tractor with front end loader attachment around the yard. (One of my life goals has been to have my own tractor, John Deere, of course). The Pirate saw me watching him. He stopped and said, "You want to drive this, don't you?" "Yes," I replied with an anticipatory smile. So, he jumped off, gave me a couple of instructions, and off I went – up the hill and down the hill, around the garages, feeling like the Driving Queen on the top of Coldstream Mountain. Eat your heart out, Jack. Gram Deb's on a tractor. Haven't driven a tractor since I was 14, when cousin W. and I took off down the hill towards the swamp, and I pushed the clutch instead of the brake, screaming all the way, until W. tramped on the brake and saved the day.

Had lunch with the men and Aunt H., just like the old days when I visited and the workers came in from the potato fields, and it was our job to set the table for the men. I set the table for lunch; what joy to do this and later do the dishes with Aunt H. again. I thought I should have red meat for my 'cells', so Aunt H. made me a very tasty one. The men were jealous. They went out to the garage to work and I started to watch Mamma Mia again (for the 3rd time) on TV. Of course, I had a beautiful winter's nap on the couch, in the house where my Mom grew up and where precious memories were made. I felt like Gram and Gramp were there again with me – remembering Gram's donuts that we used to 'steal' out of the can in the cupboard, and Gramp ranting and raving and loving on us.

The Pirate amazes me sometimes. He set up a box in his house called the "Deb Mac Broken Wing Fund," and brought over a donation from R., from Edmunston, who was on his way to Saint John. R. reads my blog because the Pirate sent him the link. I was so touched by this act of compassion – he doesn't even know me. Thank you, R. May God bless you. I thought the Pirate's title of the fund was so appropriate. I do feel like I have a broken wing – and can't fly the way I used to. I'm being carried by the prayers and support of others and the One who made my wings and is able to heal my broken wing.

I will admit I have been a bit discouraged this weekend, ever since I heard the news that I may not be able to start chemo on Monday unless my white blood cell count comes up. I have been in prayer all weekend and telling everyone I meet to pray. I expect great things to happen tomorrow morning. I remember not wanting to have chemo, and now I'm wanting to get on with it. I have been quite tired this weekend, but managed to go to church this morning and play guitar and piano and lead worship. My friend, Max, showed up and I asked her to lead with me. Of course, she did, and it was awesome. Max, Phen, and Linda sat with me at the front and ministered to me just by being there with me. Thanks, girls. I had a struggle with which hat to wear this morning, if any. My scalp is becoming very bald, with more hair falling out yesterday and today. It was the first time at church in this 'state' and I find the first time I do something is the hardest. And since I'm 'on stage,' everyone sees me. Oh well, I did it. I know they love me, hair or no hair. Vanity, vanity – all is vanity. Especially for a woman. M. told me that I looked like Aunt Jemima and everyone loves Aunt Jemima's cooking. "Yes," I said, "her pancakes." Funny. Thanks, M.

So today is Superbowl Sunday and I'm so looking forward to it. Got a secret mission to accomplish before it starts. More later – with pictures. Then hopefully a nap before the big game starts.

We go to the hospital again on Monday morning for 8:15 to have a blood test, to see if my white cell count is up. If it is, chemo starts at 9 a.m. Again, I ask for you to pray that this happens. I will try and update you tomorrow. Blessings to everyone. Watch the Superbowl if you can. ……deb x0

"Never give up. Never back down. Never lose faith" (Facing the Giants).

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